LovingBDSM

The Loving BDSM Podcast

Deciding Who’s Real and Who’s a Fake in the Online BDSM World LB141

Catfishing is something most of us probably already know and worry about in the online dating world. But what about the friends you make and the resources you trust online? How do you figure out who’s fake and who’s real? It’s not easy. But we definitely have thoughts on it, especially if some of those fakes are dispensing bad or dangerous BDSM advice.

In this episode:

  • Check out our sponsor: Delirium Toys
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  • This week’s episode came by email request from a fellow kinkster trying to navigate the online world of advice and fellow kinksters, trying to figure out who’s real.
  • It’s also timely because of a recent article I read that Molly Moore shared on an epic catfishing betrayal by a woman pretending to be man. Yes, it happens sexually and romantically most often, but not always.
  • People can be anyone they want to be on the internet, and that’s (mostly) okay. But when lies start impacting real people, then it’s problematic.
  • How do you figure out if someone’s real or not?
    • Watch their actions
    • Look for inconsistencies
    • Listen to your instincts. If something doesn’t seem right, it probably isn’t.
  • Should you speak up or call someone out for their duplicity? It depends and it’s a personal decision.

Links from the show:

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6 Comments

  1. Great topic, great job. This is all too real for so many people.

    • Kayla Lords

      August 10, 2018 at 6:44 pm

      Thanks. And you’re right, which is why it’s so harmful when someone comes along and pretends to be someone they’re not.

      • It is harmful! Its the biggest mind fuck too. Sticks with you forever.

        • Kayla Lords

          August 10, 2018 at 6:52 pm

          Yep, makes it hard to trust anyone else in the future and you end up doubting yourself. Which is why we emphasized listening to your instincts when something doesn’t seem right. It’s not a perfect solution, but hopefully people can walk away from the situation trusting their own judgement.

  2. Thank you for another amazing episode! You gave helpful advice and skillfully discussed a very real issue
    Good job 🙂

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